Blinded by love and scattered in pieces. Our brains develop these coping mechanisms and the possibility of hoping that “he will change”.
Our bodies are covered in bruises and aching of pain, still, we find a way to cover the scars and smile so the world won’t see how broken and hurt we really are. This way we protect our fellow men, the ones that’s supposed to protect us from evil, yet they are the ones we are afraid of, pretty ironic don’t you think? How do we change a society that is scared from deep within? We can’t fix them, nor can we change them. But what we can do is raise better men, we can break the cycle of generational curses that’s been shunned upon us. I can’t stress this enough. We can make a difference if we set our minds to it and if we are determined. Or has the abuse against us women and children become so normal that we just live with it? I’m tired of seeing my fellow sisters in pain and agony. As women we are supposed to flourish and be loved and taken care of as we are the ones that bring new life to this society but despite the unique gift we have and all the other capabilities we have as human beings. We are being taken for granted and treated as though we are nothing. Men act as if they are in charge of us and that our only purpose is to obey and live by their rules and if not we are punished by facing the cruelty of their hands and words.
I grew up with my grandparents and luckily for me I haven’t had to experience the heartache, pain of abuse because they shared a love that was so pure a love that is rare today. They took care of their grandchildren and tried their best to keep us behind closed doors so that we do not have to experience the evil and anger that was on the other side of the door. Well, at least that’s what I had for a short period of my childhood. I vaguely remember my mother but those memories make my heart skip a beat. She was in an abusive relationship and as much as she tried hiding the scars they were so visible but she never really talked or looked broken. I grew up thinking that this is acceptable and that one day I would be in a similar relationship. it will be okay and that it would be my fault if it happens.
You see this is what we grow up believing because our parents stay in these abusive relationships. We tend to believe that this is true love because although our mothers know that this is not love or even a relationship they should be in, they overlook it. We grow up with the idea that this is love and the cycle keeps repeating itself. I had to teach myself the difference between being loved and being used as a puppet on a string. I made the decision neither will I be treated so ill by a man nor will my future kids or their kids for that matter, because instead of me reliving the hurtful life my mother has lived I am breaking the cycle and it ends with me. I am and will forever be BRAVE enough to stand up for myself as well as others.
I want to encourage other young women and girls that come across this piece and that have been through similar experiences to stop the cycle. In order for you to overcome and live the life you are destined to live, acknowledge the problem and end it. Remember we as women are stronger together and in every way unique.
by Audery February, BRAVE Rock Girl Senior Leader